- short for Agricultural Studies.
- the only course offered at St. Cloud High School that the typical St. Cloudian youth is guaranteed to pass with an A.
- see also: not geometry
Bean Bomb (noun)
- nearly everything on a Taco Bell menu.
- food item known to explode on one's shirt, usually before meeting with members of the opposite sex.
Catfish House/Place, The (noun)
- the primary St. Cloudian fine-dining establishment.
- recently cited and temporarily closed by Florida's Division of Hotels and Restaurants for multiple health code violations.
- still considered the primary St. Cloudian fine-dining establishment.
Chinaman, The (noun)
- any Asian-style buffet restaurant.
Furious Five, The (noun)
- circa the early 2000s, a group of individuals whose numbers were rarely five.
- known for traveling to the "Mecca of Poon," AKA Pleasure Island at Downtown Disney (the only nightclubs that allowed 18-year-olds entry at the time).
- members often challenged one another to insane feats while trying to pick up women (dress only in overalls and flip-flops, create an outlandish alias and trick women into believing it, swim through Disney canal to gain illegal access to Pleasure Island rather than using traditional methods of entry, etc.).
- a term used to describe a St. Cloudian with any level of fashion sense.
- a term used to describe a St. Cloudian that grooms himself.
- a term rarely used to describe an actual homosexual individual.
- Outside of St. Cloud, this is a luxury hotel in Central Florida.
- Within St. Cloud, this is a homosexual individual.
"Get a job, you bum" (phrase)
- an exclamation shouted by local youth from a moving vehicle as they pass by a pedestrian walking near the road.
- usually followed by a standard Taco Bell crunchy taco being thrown at the pedestrian.
- a nasal exclamation shouted before engaging in a possibly life-threatening activity, usually involving a vehicle (laying in the back of a pickup truck while it attains a high rate of speed to ramp over railroad tracks, drunk driving in excess of 100 MPH on a unlit country back road with several handguns and cocaine under the seats, etc.).
- see also: Red Chris
- a person of lesser couth than the typical citizenry.
- a person fascinated by monster trucks, Sonny's BBQ, Skoal, Advanced Auto Parts, NASCAR, and the like.
- a person who has collected all of the "collectible" Coca-Cola glasses available for a limited time from McDonald's.
- a person owning a shirt that is patterned entirely as the American flag and/or having a bald eagle on it.
- a person who grew up in St. Cloud and remained there after high school graduation by choice.
- see also: redneck, hillbilly
"Is she broken?" (phrase)
- question asked to the partner of a Hispanic female that does not speak "Mexican," AKA Spanish.
- uniform worn by all non-hilljack St. Cloudian youth.
- to include chain wallet.
Mama Bird (verb)
- to chew one's food and then discharge the food into one's partner's mouth for ingestion.
- a move used to publicly establish dominance over one's partner.
- any Hispanic individual.
Native American (noun)
- ethnicity claimed by a St. Cloudian individual of painfully-obvious Italian heritage.
- claims to have fought a werewolf in an orange grove.
- common accessories: handguns, dream-catchers, throwing axes, flea market fantasy cutlery, and domestic violence knuckles.
Powerbomb onto thumbtacks (phrase)
- references a professional wrestling "Hell In a Cell" match between The Undertaker and Mankind (a reference that only a true St. Cloudian would make) in which the former slams the latter onto a mat covered in thumbtacks.
- phrase used to describe one-sided fisticuffs and/or domestic violence.
- a philosophy conceived by Shitter.
- standard operating procedures for ensnaring St. Cloudian females with little difficulty.
- successfully utilized by several associates of Shitter.
- see also: Shitter
Shitter Jitter (noun)
- dance move comprised entirely of head and neck movements.
- known as an effective female deterrent.
- painful orthodontic device known to trap large wads of food.
- applied to Shitter in his teens.
- used by Shitter to launch chewed food at Pyit at inopportune times.
State Streets, The (noun)
- the collective name for the main residential streets in the heart of St. Cloud.
- origin point for scalawags.
"Two on the sides, finger length on top" (phrase)
- much like North Korea, St. Cloudian males have a standardized haircut.
- the central highlight of the St. Cloud community.
- mating grounds for St. Cloudians.
- meeting place where local auto enthusiast "clubs" can show off their low performance 1990s Honda Civic and Chevy S-10 vehicles (accessorized with decorative gauges, one or more parts painted entirely with primer, and numerous decals, one of which must be Calvin peeing on the logo of an auto maker; the only useful accessory is a visible fire extinguisher, which will come in handy when the home-installed audio system ignites in the high school parking lot).
LEGENDARY ST. CLOUDIANS
- a person named AJ.
- AKA Anal Jizz, Ape Junk.
- known for falling victim to pranksters upon falling asleep at parties; dildos of dubious origins applied to his mouth and pictures taken for posterity.
Black Hammer of Doom, The (noun/individual)
- rotund female youth employed by local grocery chain.
- shaped more like a wrecking ball than a hammer.
- known for excessive noise production.
- moniker derived from unknown origin.
Butt Juice (noun/individual)
- a person named BJ.
- AKA Beetle Juice, Boy Juice, Butt Jouster, Brain Job.
- exceedingly nerdy individual who takes pride in dominating non-virgins in video games.
- unwashed male youth employed by a local grocery chain.
- known for punk-rock lifestyle, habitually smoking indoors at the aforementioned grocery store, putrid smell.
- currently much more successful than any other individual on this list.
- hyper-intelligent St. Cloud import from New York.
- known for hating Florida, role-playing games, seemingly boneless arms, and a crippling lack of initiative.
- will die of cancer.
- moniker derived from unknown origin.
Red Chris (noun/individual)
- a wild St. Cloudian on the fringes of Osceola county society.
- a person who engages in life-threatening activities, regardless of the collateral damage and/or consequences of said activities.
- a marijuana connoisseur.
- a hilljack who speaks with the accent, tone, and cadence of a 70-year-old black man from Alabama.
- moniker derived from individual's ginger status.
- terribly noisy neighbor if situated in an apartment above your own.
- known for making terrible decisions related to women and siring offspring.
- moniker derived from a butthole.
- an individual with an outrageous flair for tricks, pranks, and annoyances.
- professional tormentor of all levels of St. Cloud society.
- known for leopard-dyed hair, elevator boots, and peeing on other males' feet in public restrooms.
- moniker derived from individual's last name modified to account for his personality.
- a St. Cloud transplant from Indiana.
- a remarkable physical specimen of distinctly superior lineage and higher birth.
- AKA Mike Maples.
- moniker derived from "bull-shitter" to account for habitual falsehoods.
- a female that is substantially boring.
Tits McGee (noun/individual)
- a woman with substantial breasts.
- upon breast reduction, the moniker is rescinded (along with any associations to male St. Cloudians).
Vinny the Lung (noun/individual)
- a person who is not named Vinny.
- known for an inhuman cough and an unusual connection to his mother.
- an acutely tall individual lacking the will to actually pay for any item, no matter how small
- standard quote: "Let me get some of that."